I speak to you and I lose my mind. Everything I have worked on goes out the window. The control waines and my heart screams so loudly that it shatters - again.

What is wrong with me?
Why cant I be like everyone else?

I know I am not what he wants. He keeps telling me that. You would think that I have the dignity to keep walking. But I start and then I look back. And I cry and wail and moan. And Miss him terribly. But I know its not mutual so again - WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?